Thursday, October 13, 2005

But they didn't tell me HOW!

All these years, everyone has been telling me I have to forgive people, and let go of my anger. But they would never tell me HOW, just that I had to! You know how frustrating that is? I think I finally figured out a couple things. #1 - the HOW is different for everybody. #2 - you have to be able to forgive yourself before you can forgive others.

That's pretty hard! I couldn't forgive myself until I figured out that I have value, and I'm important to God. I've been hearing most of my life how God loves me, but I didn't understand, because I didn't like myself...

Figuring how the how has been life transforming. And figuring out I'm good enough to forgive people has been even better.

Tuesday, October 11, 2005

Ahhhh, vacation...

Two weeks off!!! And it's almost over... boohooooo!!! But, I'm kind of excited about going back to work. See, I love my job, I really do. I'm a 911 operator. So sometimes I get to help people, and I really like that. A lot of the stuff is routine and boring, or just plain stupid, but occasionally there's that call that really drives home the point that this is an important job. Like the lady who had heard the police helicopter abover her house, and then called 911 to say "the person they are looking for is in my backyard!" That person ended up being a serial rapist who was, in his own words, shopping for his next victim. He is now behind bars, and not harming anyone else.

Saturday, September 24, 2005

Figuring it out...

I'm still figuring out how I want to do this whole blog thing. I've got so much that I want to say, but not sure where to start. Do I tell the whole long story? Or just start from here? I'm not sure. I do know that I am not the same person I was when it all started. I didn't like myself very much then. I'm working on that. Sometimes I have moments where I still don't, but you know, now I understand that God really does love me, and if He thinks I'm worth it, then I must be!